Some women arrive in midlife through a gentle unfolding. Others arrive through a reckoning. That’s what I felt reading this one.
There is something especially powerful about a woman who has lost so much, a long-term relationship, her mother, her job, even the identity she thought held her together, and can still speak about this season with energy, hope, and a sense of newness. Not because any of it was easy, not because grief neatly wrapped itself up and made way for reinvention, but because somewhere inside all that loss, she found something she may not have fully met before: her own resilience.
What I loved most about these answers is their honesty. They don’t pretend that the beginning of her 50s was glamorous. They tell the truth about pain, identity loss, and the strange gift of a reset you never would have chosen but ended up needing. And that feels deeply midlife to me. Sometimes the life you’re meant for does not begin with clarity. Sometimes it begins with collapse, and what comes after is more aligned than anything that came before.
There’s also something beautifully grown-woman about the boundaries here. Caring less about what everyone thinks. Choosing to be around people who genuinely support and uplift. Protecting work-life balance. Trusting the process instead of trying to control every step of it. That is not giving up, that is wisdom.
What stayed with me most was the phrase: “The reset I didn’t even realise I needed”, because how many women could say that about midlife, if they were honest?
A season comes along and strips away what was familiar: a relationship ends, a parent dies, work shifts, the old identity no longer fits. And for a while, it can feel like life is falling apart. But later, often much later, you look back and realise something else was happening too. You were being redirected, reintroduced to yourself. Asked to build a life that was truer, braver, and less dictated by expectation.
I also loved the line about no longer giving a sh*t about what everyone else thinks. There is something so freeing about that kind of clarity, not in a reckless way, but in a focused way. A woman decides that only certain voices get access to her inner world. That kind of discernment changes everything.
And then there’s the beach walk with the dog, deep breaths, gratitude, and a reminder of how lucky she is. There’s something very beautiful in that, too. The reminder that even after heartbreak and upheaval, life can still feel expansive. Still worth showing up for. Still capable of surprising you.
Who are you, and what season of life are you in?
My name is Lisa Hill, I’m 53 and feeling 35. I’m at the start of an exciting new chapter, working with female entrepreneurs, and I’m absolutely loving it. It truly feels like the beginning of a brand-new journey.
What surprised you most about your 50s?
My 50s didn’t start well. I experienced a lot of loss in my long-term relationship, my mother, and my job. It felt like I had lost my entire identity. What surprised me most, though, was discovering my own resilience. I also learned the importance of allowing myself to fully feel the grief and pain and move through it. In the end, it turned out to be the reset I didn’t even realise I needed.
One thing you’ve stopped doing (and you’re better for it):
Giving a sh*t about what everyone else thinks. Or, more accurately, I only care about the opinions of the people who truly matter to me. Letting go of that has made me more energised, focused, and confident.
One thing you’re choosing instead:
I’m choosing to spend my time and energy only with people who genuinely support and uplift one another. Everything else is just noise.
One boundary you now honour, no apology:
Protecting my work–life balance. I still work hard, but now it’s on my terms.
One micro-decision that changed everything:
Choosing to trust the process (not to try and control it!) and having the courage to take the leap and change my path.
One practice that keeps you steady:
Taking an early morning beach walk with my dog, breathing deeply, being grateful, and reminding myself how lucky I am.
One belief about midlife you no longer subscribe to:
That a woman over 50 is “old”.
The best thing about being in your 50s:
Confidence. Owning who I am. And finally, people have stopped asking me about children! Don’t get me wrong, I love kids, but my 30s were tough with constant questions about marriage, family, and being labelled “the career one!”
Complete this: At 50+, I am…
Braver, more ambitious (in a healthy way), energised and happier in both my professional and personal life than I ever thought possible. Sure, some days it’s scary and uncertain, but I’m all in!
This week, I want women turning 50 to remember:
It’s never too late to change your course, to not just dream, but to go after those dreams. Take the leap. The time is now.
My Note to My Future Self
What I love about these answers is how much life is in them, not untouched life, not polished life, but real life. The kind that breaks you open, teaches you things you never asked to learn, and then hands you the chance to begin again with more self-trust than before.
I think this is one of the truths women need to hear more often: losing what once defined you does not mean you are lost forever. Sometimes it is exactly what makes room for the woman you were always meant to become.
And there is something deeply powerful about a woman over 50 who knows she is not old, not finished, not fading, but just getting started differently. Braver, more energised, more honest about what matters, more willing to leap.
If you’re following along this week
My Stop: Where am I still giving too much power to other people’s opinions?
My Start: What would it look like to spend more time with people who genuinely support and uplift me?
My Boundary: Where do I need to protect my work-life balance more fiercely?
My Micro-decision: What would change if I stopped trying to control the whole process and simply trusted the next step?
My Practice: What simple ritual helps me feel grounded, grateful, and connected to my life?
Journal prompt: What if this chapter is not the aftermath of loss, but the beginning of the life I was always meant to live?
If you’d like to be part of the ‘85 Weeks to Fifty' series, or you know a woman whose voice would feel like medicine here, email me at hello@kiransinghuk.com. And if you’re reading this thinking, same, tell me in the comments: What is your takeaway from this interview?