There’s something deeply compelling about a woman who refuses to let age become a script she didn’t write.
That’s what I felt reading Marilynn Larkin’s answers. She begins with such a brilliant line: “According to Google, I am in the winter of my life, but I see myself as a woman of all seasons.” And honestly, that sentence tells you so much. There is humour in it. Defiance, perspective, and a deep refusal to be reduced to a category, an age bracket, or someone else’s idea of what a woman should be doing by now.
What I loved most about Marilynn’s answers is that her 50s were not a quiet winding down, but a decade of risk, movement, embodiment, and expansion. At 54, she entered a natural bodybuilding challenge for the first time. What began as a personal challenge became the beginning of something much bigger: fitness certifications, personal training, posture-awareness work, a DVD, talks, workshops, and, later, another bodybuilding competition as a way to fight back after a cancer diagnosis. That stayed with me.
Because this is what I keep hearing in these conversations: midlife is not the end of the story. For so many women, it is the moment they stop waiting for permission and start becoming visible to themselves.
What else stayed with me most was how Marilynn turned the age of 50 into a challenge rather than a ceiling.
So many people around her were beginning to say, “I’m too old to do this.” Instead of absorbing that belief, she questioned it. What could she do to defy perceptions? Could she take a risk? Could she inspire others not to limit themselves? And then she did.
There is something so powerful about that, because many women don’t realise they are inspiring others while they’re still figuring themselves out. Marilynn didn’t enter that bodybuilding challenge thinking, “This is my legacy.” She entered it as a woman willing to put herself out there. But people saw her. They came up to her. They told her she was inspiring them.
Sometimes that’s how purpose begins. Not with a polished plan, but with a woman saying yes to something brave, only to realise her courage has become a permission slip for someone else.
I also loved her boundaries around fun, money, and learning. Whatever she does must include at least two of the three. That is such a clean, grown-woman filter. It says: "My energy matters. My time matters. My life is not here to be drained by things that give nothing back.”
Who are you, and what season of life are you in?
I’m Marilynn Larkin, and according to my Google search, I’m in the winter of my life. But I really think of myself as a woman of all seasons.
What surprised you most about your 50s?
“50” seemed like such a defining number, a time when many people around me were starting to say, “I’m too old to do XX.” I took it as a challenge! What could I do to defy perceptions? Was I confident enough to tell other people, “No, don’t limit yourself?”, but could I take a risk myself?
I had told myself I didn’t want to be living alone at age 50, but the man I was seeing at the time had other ideas, so that didn’t change. But what did change was my ability to “put myself out there.” For the first time, at age 54, I did a natural bodybuilding challenge, spurred on by my trainer. It turned out they announced my age when they introduced me, and I was wondering why. I found out afterwards that it was one of my first steps toward inspiring others. When I was in training for the competition, people would come up to me and tell me I was inspiring them. So, I decided to get my fitness certifications and start personal training on top of my ongoing writing business.
That led me to develop a posture-awareness program (posture is the key to so much!), make a DVD, and travel around the country giving talks and workshops. All in all, my 50s were a time of intense growth and transformation that set the stage for the years that followed.
Notably, I never entered another bodybuilding competition until two years ago, as a way to fight back against a cancer diagnosis and to start building a legacy project that inspires as many people as possible to get and stay strong, not be deterred by adversity, and forge ahead.
One thing you’ve stopped doing (and you’re better for it):
I stopped worrying about relationships with men and just let them happen.
One thing you’re choosing instead:
Making sure I get something meaningful out of everything I do, rather than feeling like I should do something because someone else wants me to. A recent perfect example was deciding not to enter another bodybuilding competition, even though my trainer wanted me to. I recently started taking self-defence/martial arts classes, which I love, and I would have to take time off from that if I did another competition.
One boundary you now honour, no apology:
Whatever I do has to have two of these features (one isn’t enough): fun, money, and learning. Also, I won’t allow anyone I’m with, for social or business purposes, to drain me.
One micro-decision that changed everything:
Telling myself to slow down (admittedly, I do this intermittently, but I DO do it when needed).
One practice that keeps you steady:
If I’m having trouble deciding what I want to do or how I feel about something, I lie down on the couch and listen to all the voices playing in my head, all with diverse opinions. I separate what “me” is from other voices (remnant of parents, current friends, etc.).
One belief about midlife you no longer subscribe to:
That it’s the beginning of the end.
The best thing about being in your 50s:
I had a tremendous amount of energy and was involved in many physical activities, such as weight training, dancing, and performing in plays and indie films. I still have lots of energy, but not as much as before. I’m glad I took advantage of the opportunities that presented themselves and that I made happen.
Complete this: At 50+, I am…
Strong and happy!
This week, I want women turning 50 to remember:
To live life fully! Don’t underestimate yourself; don’t hold yourself back; don’t let others hold you back. Give yourself permission to learn, grow, and feel proud of yourself. It’s not egotism or narcissism; it’s simply being authentic and allowing yourself to transform.
My Note to My Future Self
What I love about Marilynn’s answers is the permission in them. Permission to take the risk, permission to be proud of yourself, permission to try something at 54, or later, and let it become the beginning of something you could not have predicted, permission to stop seeing age as a warning sign and start seeing it as a threshold.
I keep thinking about her practice of lying down and listening to all the voices in her head, separating what is truly hers from what belongs to parents, friends, expectations, or old conditioning. That feels like such important midlife work. Because by the time we reach this stage, we have collected so many voices. So many opinions. So many inherited fears. And the work is not to silence everything immediately, but to discern: “Which voice is mine?”
And maybe that is what living fully really asks of us. Not to become fearless, but to become honest enough to know which voice we are following.
If you’re following along this week
My Stop: Where am I telling myself I’m too old, too late, or too far behind?
My Start: What brave thing would I try if I allowed myself to be a beginner again?
My Boundary: Does this give me fun, money, or learning? If not, why am I saying yes?
My Micro-decision: Where do I need to slow down enough to hear what I truly want?
My Practice: How can I separate my real voice from all the inherited ones?
Journal prompt: What would I do differently if I stopped underestimating myself and gave myself full permission to transform?
If you’d like to be part of the ‘85 Weeks to Fifty' series, or you know a woman whose voice would feel like medicine here, email me at hello@kiransinghuk.com. And if you’re reading this thinking, same, tell me in the comments: What is your takeaway from this interview?